First of all, I’d like to thank all of the participants of the 1st Fantastic Bonanza Free T-Shirt Contest!
Second of all, it’s time to announce the winners! There ended up being a tie between Eric, for petting a llama, and Swati, for turning off your alarm on a Sunday, as the most fantastic things that ever happened ever! Congratulations!
Third of all, it’s time for this February the Seventh’s question/prompt: “If Fantastic Bonanza weren’t a super-awesome t-shirt company, what would it be?” Just leave your response as a comment to this blog post, and make sure to fill out the “email” field, so we can contact you if you win! As always, the prize for the entry that we think is the best is a free Fantastic Bonanza t-shirt of your choice. Ready… GO!
And now, last month’s winning entries:
Eric
What’s the most fantastic thing that has ever happened to me? Hmm…going to college? Nah, not really. Finishing high school? Definitely not. Petting a llama? YES, OF COURSE! Llamas are not only the most amazing and intriguing animal on earth (really, they are), but they also embody what this question asks for: FANTASTIC-NESS. And yes, I just made that word up. Llamas are lovable, soft, and darn-right cute. Not to mention, they dominate those other quadrupeds like horses and camels. Having humps are so overrated these days. But back to the point…this llama was the epitome of being fantastic. So thus, my experience petting it at the county fair is ultimately the most fantastic experience. EVER.
Swati
The best thing ever is having your alarm go off at some unearthly hour and you scramble out of bed, but then you realize that it’s Sunday and you just slam the alarm off and go back to bed for another like eight hours, dead to the world.
That is the best thing ever, ever.
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I think that Fantastic Bonanza should be something like a cross between a Chuckee Cheese, a rave, a drag race, a lightsaber battle, and a mini-golf course all set in virtual reality, with special guest host Moses and appearances by Abba, Death Cab, and Rob Zombie. And, of course, text message voting.
If not a super-awesome t-shirt company, Fantastic Bonanza would be a play. Nay, musical. It would feature the scarecrow from the Wizard of Oz with a fat Irish drunkard. Why the scarecrow, you ask? Why the fat Irish drunkard, you ask with even more incredulity?
It’s quite simple. You need an improbable pairing to make the resulting dialogue/action fantastic. And “bonanza” essentially means to hit the jackpot, and I doubt you’ll argue that encountering a merry Irish lad and his scarecrow friend would be anything short of hitting the jackpot–particularly if you were a bit intoxicated yourself.
Together, they (and potentially you, if it were an interactive musical) would traverse the plains of time and go on dangerous quests requiring a fantastic amount of courage and luck, until such point as they reached the end of their bonanzic ways.
The End. (curtain closes) (audience cheers, curtain call, and as audience members leave, they pass a sign by the entrance with the musical’s title in bold: FANTASTIC BONANZA!)
If Fantastic Bonanza weren’t a T-shirt company it would be my ex-girlfriend, who I still don’t talk to.
A sliced bread company
fantastic bonanza sounds like a frozen banana stand. but they don’t just dip their bananas in chocolate or nuts, they have 47 different dipping choices. yes, 47. why? BECAUSE I SAID SO! and not only do they have 47 different flavor dipping options, they also have bananas foster (that flaming banana thing) and their own banana-fied version of the awesome blossom (that chili’s onion thing). and fantastic bonanza would have a logo that is on fire. ok?
by the way, i hate bananas with a hearty passion.
If Fantastic Bonanza weren’t a super-awesome t-shirt company, it would be a rollercoaster ride. Not just ANY rollercoaster ride, it would be a water rollercoaster ride inside a gigantic REAL haunted house. It would be the fastest, longest, greatest and highest rollercoaster ever. Ever. At a random time, the rollercoaster would stop and people would have to get off and find their way out. Sounds simple right? Not at all. Did I mention that Fantastic Bonanza is completely pitch black? And also, the rollercoaster only has one train, so after it drops people off, it won’t start up for another 8 hours. “But then Fantastic Bonanza won’t get any money!” Yes they will. When I say a gigantic REAL haunted house, I mean gigantic. The rollercoaster splits up into 15 different directions. 15 different rides everytime. Plus, a train holds 300 people. Excellent.
Welcome to Fantastic Bonanza. Complete darkness. Exhilarating. Wet. Scared. Cold.
Fantastic.
Fantastic Bonanza sounds like some crazyass all-you-can-eat sushi place
FANU-TASHTICU BO-NA-ZARU!!! HAJIME!!!
with iron-chef-like commentators rushing around the kitchen while fireworks are going off against the brilliant red sunset and sumo are fighting ninja
and that happens forever.
If Fantastic Bonanza weren’t awesome tees, it would be a Celebreality Show on VH-1 where A-List, like Bruce Willis and Keifer Sutherland, (not lame B or C’ers) compete on a working Ranch, rounding up the cattle and protecting them against marauding PETA demonstrators dressed in faux suede ‘indian’ outfits.
Hosted by Jack Palance (Curly from City Slickers)… oh wait, he’s dead.