Pelicans? Pelicans.

Smells a bit fowl to me.

Hah. See what I did there?

Actually, I should probably avoid making stupid animal jokes simply for the sake of punnery. I may one day encounter a repugnant chicken, after all—and just where would I be then? Punless, that’s where: north of Tongue-Tied, east of Mumblin’ and Fumblin’, west of Johndoesnotusewordscleverlyville. Man, I hate that town. It’s like they have a grudge or something. All I did was accidently introduce a strain of West Nile Virus into their marina.

Hey, speaking of birds, have you noticed that the pelican is starting to carve a place for itself in the shirtosphere?1 It’s true! I first noticed the phenomenon while browsing SquidFire’s new winter lineup of hoodies and jackets.


Pelican Hoodie at SquidFire: $45.00

The design is straightforward enough—sure to please any ornithologist who harbors a soft spot for—well, for harbors. SquidFire seems content enough to admire the pelican from dry shores, but a certain other clothing line does not appear to find this adequate.


Pelican at Enclothe: $15.00

Enclothe seems invested in preserving whatever little dignity the pelican may still have—but at what cost? Though perhaps it is “a goofy, absurdly comical figure” on land, when in flight, the bird transforms into “a compact and graceful creature”, as Enclothe puts it. I’m not one to disagree, but come on, Enclothe—you don’t like absurdly comical animals? Cor! To think that we should willfully disguise some of the animal’s most distinctive characteristics. What’s next, blue-footed booby booties?2

Part of the reason why I mention pelicans in particular is that Fantastic Bonanza considered publishing its own pelican design once upon a time. The world would have known the full fury of “Devious Pelican” in late 2006 if only we had communicated our intent more cleverly:

pelicanhybrid.gif
What might have been.

If you have to beat people over the head with the premise, well—then you’re probably doing it wrong. Even then, the scene is admittedly not very clear,4 which—ultimately, sadly, inadmissibly—distracts from the pelican’s deviousness.

Don’t let the bitter taste of Fantastic Bonanza’s aborted creative endeavors get you down, though! Show your appreciation for one of bird-dom’s most awesomely absurd constituents over at either SquidFire or Enclothe, if you’re so inclined.


1When am I going to stop using that word.
2I AM SERIOUS :-[3
3Which is to say that I am actually not all serious and am in fact giving Enclothe a hard time in an ostensibly jocular manner for my own amusement.
4I mean, is there actually a person trapped inside, or is it just a clever ruse? I cannot tell!

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